Desperately wanting Cindy to come back
Nasty fall at work robs New Glasgow woman of her memory, her ability to work, her life
By CATHY VON KINTZEL Truro Bureau
Sat. Jan 10 - 11:43 AM
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 "Cindy Shaw cosies up on a couch with her dog, Dexter. The New Glasgow woman uses medical reports and letters to help recall details of her life since she suffered a head injury at work in April. (CATHY VON KINTZEL / Truro Bureau)</p>")
NEW GLASGOW — Cindy Shaw never misses breakfast with her spouse, John.
Otherwise, she might forget to eat.
The 46-year-old New Glasgow woman with the warm smile loves music but can’t recall words to her favourite songs. She loves people but doesn’t recognize some friends.
"It’s like starting all over every day," said Ms. Shaw who sustained a head injury at work last April.
A wrinkled blue hospital gown, sketchy memories and more questions than answers are all she has left from that day, which she describes as a blur. Her life of headaches, memory loss, financial woes and dealings with the Nova Scotia Workers’ Compensation Board since then has been a "nightmare."
"I want financial help, therapy and to go back to work," she said in an interview at her downtown apartment.
According to her spouse and friends, Ms. Shaw used to be happy-go-lucky and outgoing.
"I sit here in a world of my own and I wonder if I’m ever going to get Cindy back," she said, sometimes referring to herself by name.
Ms. Shaw was working with the kitchen staff of a Pictou County nursing home when she got dizzy, fell and hit her head April 2 after getting a staff tuberculosis test that involves a needle.
A co-worker described her in an incident report as being unresponsive to pain and sound. She stopped breathing three times, requiring mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.
Ms. Shaw has vague memories of waking up in Aberdeen Regional Hospital and being so hungry she ate two trays of food. Her uniform was ripped, so she was still wearing her hospital gown as a shirt when she was discharged to drive home alone in her van, which was parked nearby. The 10-minute drive to Westville took three hours.
"I don’t know where I was, where I went. It’s so scary."
Her spouse, who asked to be identified only by his first name, said he got a call that there had been an incident but that she was OK. He was frantic by the time she pulled into the driveway.
John put her to bed, only to rush her to hospital the next day because she was incoherent due to a concussion.
They can’t understand why she was released from hospital on her own and wonder whether a rest or blood pressure check before or after her needle would have prevented her fall.
Eileen MacIsaac, spokeswoman for the Pictou County Health Authority, wasn’t familiar with Ms. Shaw’s situation but said her organization wants to hear from people with concerns about the care they’ve received.
Ms. Shaw was initially denied workers’ compensation for her injury. While she appealed, financial strain forced her back to work in July. She had difficulty recognizing co-workers and the residents, so she chose background jobs like washing dishes.
"I love my job and I love my residents," she said. "But people came to me, and honestly, honey, I didn’t know who they were."
A co-worker who did not want to be named said she watched her friend withdraw.
"Cindy’s got a heart the size of Nova Scotia . . . of pure gold," she said. "But she’s not herself. She’s forgetful. She’s still giving, but mentally there’s a change."
Ms. Shaw felt better last summer, crediting her work routine and regular therapy arranged by her family doctor. That changed in the fall when her workers’ compensation claim was approved. She had to give up her therapist for one approved by the board, but one was never appointed.
"I could feel myself getting worse during the time I didn’t have a therapist."
She slipped into what her neurologist described as a psychotic state on Dec. 5 and wound up back in hospital for a week. That same neurologist told John earlier this year the head injury could take six months to two years, perhaps longer, to heal.
Ms. Shaw is off work again, relying on photographs, medical reports and John to jog her memory. The compensation board denied her newest claim, believing it’s unrelated to her fall. She’s appealing and in the meantime is hoping to get her therapist back.
John remains her full-time caregiver, getting little sleep and afraid to leave her alone.
"She’s forgetful and agitated, not the happy-go-lucky, independent person she was," he said. For her part, Ms. Shaw doesn’t know where she’d be without him.
"I feel like it’s just a matter of time before I shut down again," she said, visibly frustrated that nobody seems to be listening to her.
"Am I supposed to sit here like a zombie and go into a shell? Cindy can’t do it no more."
